Saturday, November 21, 2009

So far, so good

I've spent the last few days peeing on sticks, comparing the darkness of second lines and all the usual neurotic shit that pregnant women with a history of miscarriage go on with. I had my first blood test to check progesterone, oestradiol and beta hcg on Wednesday, and the levels were all as good as can be expected at this stage. HCG was 49, but given that was 15 dpo, that is ok. Of course when I got the results, I immediately started googling "hcg levels 15 dpo". Anyway it's all good so far.

I'm going to continue going to my wonderful Napro nurse for weekly blood tests for the next few weeks, so she is more or less taking on my care for the first trimester. It gives me a great feeling of reassurance to have my hormone levels checked on a weekly basis. I felt brave enough the other day to put my name down for an early ultrasound, so I called the Early Pregnancy Unit in Limerick maternity hospital. So December the 16th I will have my first ultrasound. If I am still pregnant by then, I should be 8 weeks along. Part of me is thinking all sorts of negative thoughts. Like what if they diagnose a missed miscarriage then and they take me in for another D&C a few days before Christmas. My sister calls this kind of thought process meeting trouble half way, so I am trying not to think like this.

The other half of my brain is already working out due dates, churning possible names around in my head, and wondering if it's a boy or a girl. For some reason we both think boy this time. Oh well, I suppose we have a 50/50 chance of being correct. I am really trying not to indulge in these kind of thoughts too. I just don't want to make too much emotional investment in this and then have my world come crashing down around me again.

The wonderful thing about not being back at work these days is that I can hide away from the world and rest whenever I feel like it. So there's no trying to stay awake at my desk or answer queries from head office when all I want to do is go home and sleep. If I'm tired, I can just rest up on demand. So there's something to be said for unemployment after all.

Yesterday I took another digital clear blue test and it came up "pregnant 2-3 weeks", so that gave me more reassurance that my hcg levels must be rising to some extent. My next beta is on Tuesday, so I'm keeping everything crossed until then. The a la carte crisis Catholic in me is even lighting candles. I will keep you posted on results.


womb for improvement said...

It's a bit odd how pleased I am for you. Although maybe the warm glow I got from reading this post was just from all those candles.

Fran said...

Your sister is right, away with those negative thoughts!! wowow you'll be 8 weeks ALREADY on the 16 of Decemeber!!! That's just amazing! Big hugs, Fran

Mick said...

You got pregnant the same time as us!

A summer baby is the best. I have lots of nice clothes if you want them ;-)

Continued good luck!

Xbox4NappyRash said...

Everything crossed.

Lisa DG said...

I cannot express how happy I am for you. I can cry from the excitement. I know too well what I scary time right now can be. Just put your feet up and rest for you and baby. Your body is doing exactly what it is supposed to do. And baby- someone gave me some words of wisdom I would like to pass on to you. Life is a very powerful force. Once it takes hold, it does not easily let go.

Cross fingers, thinking positive thoughts, saying prayers and wearing lucky socks for you.

Jane G said...

@ WFI - I know, it's mad how excited you can get for someone you have ever met in real life. Although as you say it could be the candles!

@ Fran - I am trying to chase away the negative thoughts but it's not easy.

@ Mick - Yes it will be a summer baby if it goes the distance. All donations greatfully accepted!

@ Xbox - Thanks!

@ Lisa - Wise words. Thank you. I hope all is well with you and your little bump?

C said...

Glad to hear that your wonderful nurse will continue to follow you. While some people might think of us as neurotic, I think continuous blood tests and hpts are reassuring.

Thinking of you and lighting some candles at my house, too.